Fully retractable

So I am completely bored tidy and there is No hope of leaving anytime soon. What the f*ck! Why must we be tortured like this? I really need something to do and they have everything blocked on the Internet on the damn work computers. I wonder if my laptop would be blocked if I brought it in and plug it up? Probably.

Yes, yes I know I have not been writing much lately, just too freaking busy with life. Well how is my life going? Thanks for asking, it has been well the same. I work, I come home, I play with pumps and then he goes to sleep. I pick up the house and then I go to bed and repeat every freaking day. I know it is not going to change, pumps makes it this way, but I really think I need to get a life. I just hate to leave him or not be there for him. His father is practically gone and I feel like I should be there.

I have not been completley bored. I have gone out with my friends and done things around the house and stuff. I know I seem like I am complaining, but really it is not that bad.

And the whole divorce is going. I had to turn in a bunch of paperwork to fill with the courts. It is done and now I am just waiting on ohm to get served and hopefully get this over with soon. I am ready to be free of him.

So thanksgiving is coming up and the girls I worked with asked me if ohm was coming. I said no he is not apart of my family and he is not invited to thanksgiving. They were like he is pumps dad and you need to make friends with him. No I don’t and if anyone needs to be trying to make friends with anyone it is ohm with me. I have given him everything I could possibly given him and I have nothing left. I now need to make sure that pumps and myself are okay and taken care of. I can’t be friends with him. I have tried and he has just kept on doing what it is that he does. He beds to fix this and he doesn’t care, he doesn’t want too.

You lately he has been calling mom mom and that just has me totally pissed off. She is not his mom and again not apart of our family. And then Monday or Sunday he left a chandlier at the house for mom. He go it for $15. he has not paid child support in 2 weeks or more (not sure how long) and he is wasting money on stuff we don’t need. Why don’t you take care of your child? I mean you are a man enough to produce sperm and Fuck, take care of your damn responsiblities before you waste money! Jackass!

Okay done. You know I am so tired of him. I really just wish he would go away and leave us alone. I truely think that we would be so much better without him. Pumps is young he won’t remember and when he does ohm is just going to break his heart. I don’t know. I am just so tired of him and him invading my mind and heart. He needs to get the fuck on and I think I am the only one who can do that. Damn I hate self-realization. Why do I have to do this shit?


I think I need some beer or maybe just good sex? Huh?

So in my boredom at work today I went to eHarmony.com and di their little test thing. I answered all the questions to the best of my ability. I thought to myself how acurate are these personality test, yes it is just a personality test? Who knows? Well when I was done I went to get my matches. It said according to our records you are still married. No shit Sherlock I am getting a divorce and am seperated. I really want to call a chew someone out about that.

Anyway I am not sure what I should do about the whole online dating thing? Will I be a loser? No I don’t think so. Well mmm might call me lame, but I am sure that eharmony is not for her. I don’t go anywhere to meet people and ms. McCormick’s mom always said you will never meet anyone in your living room. And then there is actual dating services and speed dating and all kinds of crap. I don’t necessary want to meet someone to marry just someone to Fuck and hang out with would be nice. I don’t need a relationship. And then I think of the people that have hit on me in the past eww! I need something to filter them. No more dirty sanchez’ please! What to do what to do?

I am so freaking bored and no one is in the office right now and we can’t freaking leave this is just nuts. And I have to work on Friday! Boo!

I need plan and I need to think for a while.


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