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Monthly Archives: July 2010

I am extremely proud of myself. I have been working on my training for the 5k and i signed up today. I am not sure I will be able to run, but I definitely will walk it and finish it. I really do think I can do a marathon within the next 8 years. hard work and dedication will get you far in life. I must remember that and not be such a slacker, but you know that is my generation.

So life, has been well interesting. I have missed putting up the misadventures of myself and MMM. I will try to do better. Writing is such an outlet for me. It always has been. I think it always will be. And a blog is so much better then my books. I always get rid of them after a while. here it is done and then I just move on.

So again life. Goose had a really bad tumble on Wednesday. He had a hugh bump on his forhead and he has a busted lip still. That child of mine is such a picker. He was picking at his scabs today at school. He just won’t leave them alone. I am a picker too. i guess they just pick things up or it is all genetic. He is awesome. we did have a feww weeks where we werre not behaving like we should. It actually started after the crazy weekend with his dad in which OHM and his girlfriend got into a physical fight. I had to have a talk with goose about listening and following instruction and not just doing whatever he wants to do. He has been much better since the talk, but it sucks that I have to fix all the shit his dad pulls. I guess i can do it, but I just feel like I shouldn’t have to. I am the better person and I know how to raise a child.

It is just so funning how that happens. I never wanted children and when I got pregnant it was like okay, I am going to be a mother and that was just okay. And then he came and it was the greatest thing ever. Now I don’t care for the little babies so much that need everything and such. When they hit 3 to 4 I love it. And that is where I am now. 3 years old going on a fully grown man. Most days he still tries to get me to help dothings, but I always tell him he can do it. He says he can’t alot and tell him that is not a word in our vocabulary, and that he can do anything. You know I am right he can do anything, just like I can there is no such thing as can’t. Anyway, motherhood just came to me and I am not sure how. It just all seems so natural. i am really laid back about all things, and I think that is how I parent. Goose will be okay, there is not much you can do in this world that will actually kill you. i was always okay. The only thing I worry about is someone taking him, be it his father or stranger. I really do freak if I can’t see him for 2 seconds in a store or really any where but home. At home he can roam free, but elsewhere nope in the cart or holding my hand only. I don’t know what I would do if I lost him. I think, well it would be pretty bad.

It is funny how things in life just come to you and how you end up being good at something or whatever. I wonder whatelse will come my way and I will just know how to do it.

So random, today iw as thinking about changing my favortite color. You know I can’t be like everyone else and it seems that everyone I meet loves purple. I think I might go red or yellow or maybe orange. Out of all those colors red looks best on me and that is the color of my car and I usually have my nails hooker red (not now, currently purple, ironic huh?). Yes i think my new offical favorite color is red. I gues sI should look up how many people actually like the color red before I decide. I really can’t be like everyone else. it just pisses me off. Hmmm?

i think I need to sleep. tomorrow is friday and I have a quiet weekend planned for myself.

later haters

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So you know I have made a list of things I want to do before I am 40. Yes peeps I am that old, 31 working my way on up. And the big thing was not to go anywhere, do anything in particular, except to RUN A MARATHON!

I am overweight and a pack a day smoker currently. So my exercise abilities are not that great. I have asked everyone I know if they want to do this with me. And no takers. MMM and LM looked at me like I was crazy. My brothers both stated they only run when people are chasing them, so I think I am on my own. I can do this I know that, it’s I am just so tired all the time and lazy. You knowI might be tired due to the fact that I am out of shape, overweight, eat crappy and smoke like a chimmney, don’t forget drink like a fish as well. I think I need to find the time to take care of myself. if not for me, at least for Goose. maybe he should be my motivation, my inspiration. I want him to know that you can do anything you want to if you try hard enough, hmmm? So you should have some motivation or inspiration to actually do a marathon according to the one website I was on and it should not be to lose weight, because then you will just quit it said. I don’t really have that except I want to, well you know goose too, but really I just want too. I want to be part of that 1% that has run a marathon. i think when i do this, i might consider training for a triathlon. That may be a bit much at this point. “baby steps, baby steps” (I love that movie ” What about Bob?”).

 I am starting small first a 5k then the peachtree a 10k, then probably a half marathon and then a full marathon. I figure I got about 8 years before I turn 40 and you know I might get it done before then. We shall see.

My work is doing this corperate walk/run challenge in Sept. and I am going to do it. it is a 5k and I probably won’t be able to run the whole thing, but I am sure as hell going to try.

I did go online and look up some information on training to be a runner and I have a handy dandy training schedule. i should have started monday according to this schedule, but I will catch up I will just train on my off days this week.

On one website, it stated that I needed to be able to run for 30 mins no stop before could begin training for a, well anything. I am not sure I can do that, actually I know I can’t. I guess I need to get on it dog gone it. 

Step one: Follow training schedule for 5k and walk/ run and complete the 5k. I don’t care if I run the whole thing as long as I go and finish.

Well I have to sept 17. I need to get on training. Training begins tomorrow.

i hope to keep writing and i shall let you know of my progress. I know I can do this and I know that I will.

First and foremost, I have been away. I think I have just checked out of life and been on cruise control. Actually just tired and lazy. Sorry, but I suppose it does not matter since my blog never really gets any hits.

Okay what is up jack?

My divorce is final, as of jun 10th. I am no longer JAM I am now once again JAK and will always be for the rest of time. I will, REPEAT I WILL NEVER CHANGE MY NAME AGAIN!!!! It kinda feels good to be rid of the trash offically,but then I still get shit all the time.

Example, 2 weekends ago, the other woman called me. OHM and her got in a physical fight in front of my son. I called him and he was bringing goose home. Now my son is having behavior problems, not listening and hitting and screaming. He has been getting in trouble at school. I don’t know if witnessing the fight caused all this, but he has been very upset since the fight. I am pretty sure that OHM has told my son that it is all the other woman’s fault and that she is mean to him, like he tells goose I am mean to him. it is really just crap, but I suppose this is what I will have to do for the rest of my life, fix my son from the wrapped thoughts and actions of his father.

I don’t know if OHM will be deported. I think the other woman is going to help him get his papers. I hope to god she does not. he does not desevre it, but again I have no say in what happens to him. I unfortunately do need to discuss with him how his actions over the past few weeks have affected goose and how I am not going to tolerate it and how he needs to get his shit together and if he is going to continue to leave with the other woman, she is not to be around my child if they are going to fight.

You know all  want is the best for goose, and this does include the best of OHM for him. I don’t care what the hell he has done to the other woman or what goes on between them, but he needs to keep that shit away from my child. I gues I will have to call him tomorrow.

Moving on the rest of my life. Work is work. crazy busy and never seeming to end. My lastest problem has occured because a monitor neglected to schedule his visit with me. The first I heard of him coming was last Wednesday and today he thought he could be here all week. I told him he may come in tomorrow morning, but he will have to leave beffore my other monitor gets here. Let’s see if he shows up at 730. And he was upset. You know, you have to schedule the visit with me, email me call me, something, don’t tell my boss and think it is scheduled. YOU SCHEDULE VISITS WITH THE COORDINATOR!!! Fucking idiot.

I am so tired and stressed it is always something and never seems to go away.

I did have alot of fun the weekend. Our usual spot Nik’s and man did we have some fun. We have not had that much fun in a long time. MMM stated the pics were great, she is burning them to a CD for me. i might post some when I get them. So it all started because MMM wanted to go out. It was her 31st birthday on minday and she wanted a girls night out. So me, MMM, LM, S, and K went out. K was drunk when she got there. That really is about normal for her. S does not really drink, but man that woman is awesome and so much fun.

So Nik’s has this game on the back porch where you have to get this ring on a hook. Sounds easy, it’s not and I have not eye-hand coordination so I could not do. LM tired all night and finally got it.

Jesus was there with some guy he knows. They were talking religion and Iwas trying to become inlightened and LM kept calling me a traitor because I was out there. Jesus’ friend stated some very interesting facts about all of us and I had to prove some pnts to myself, but they were all in my head.

So this was not the best post. I shall do more tomorrow. Later haters